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ghost of christmas future

from everything's coming up thrillho by blue lotus

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lyrics

I picture myself in older age
placing flowers on the table
in a painfully silent room
with no assurance from anyone
that things were in fact, real
or that anyone remembers
how I said I felt, and as I
sit down at the table
with a pen, and some paper
I glance up quickly
at the flowers,
and something clicks
and I am back there
I discover a photographic
memory for carefully arranged
and planted produce
in evenly seeded rows, and
I discover a photographic
tendency for
an ever changing face,
placed at a distance, hidden
in figures of speech and slips
of a faded tongue
“You look like someone
that I know,
but not as well as I know you,
or so I thought I knew”
and it all comes crashing back
I’m in my kitchen
with a lacerated vision
of a past with no redeemers
of a life I didn’t live in
of a god with no believer,
a believer with no god.

credits

from everything's coming up thrillho, released January 22, 2015

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